English this quarter is a lot of interesting going on, this quarter we were studying novel study from a book called banner in the sky. Which talks about a character called Rudi which is a boy who showed such big courage and guts to not give up and he carried his father dreams and achieved it. We created creative writting and oral tests about the book. The character shows how he developed from a boy into a mature adult. The work sample that will represent my novel studies is my creative writing essay.
'Banner in the Sky' a novel filled adventures, written by James Ramsey Ullman is a story of a Young Man named Rudi Matt who is trying to chase his dreams to complete his father’s task[S2] . The task is to climb the Citadel, the hardest [S3] mountain in the Alps. The story tells how his [S4] mom prevents him from climbing the Citadel, which forced him to make foolish mistakes which lead him to his dream. Rudi Matt's dream is no special dream. Every other Kurtalers around have [S5] the same dream of summiting the Citadel. Even so, the Kurtalers were traumatized by the death of Joseph [S6] Matt on that mountain. Rudi's desire and determination was very strong, that nothing is scaring him down[S7] . Throughout the book, James Ramsey Ullman tells about how a boy chase [S8] his dreams until the end. The requirement to chase the dream is to believe what you do and just chase it. Just like Rudi, he [S9] knows that he can’t climb the Citadel because his smom doesn’t let him too[S10] . But he decided to rebel his mom commands and climb the citadel. [S11] For several minutes Rudi stood there, motionless. Then he turned left. (p 138) [S12] Rudi was not thinking straight, he tries to do everything in order for his dream to be complete[S13] . So he decided to take the Citadel alone where clearly [S14] Captain Winter told him to go home to Kurtal. This shows how will a person [S15] do anything for chasing his dream. Together we can do it, I tell you. Together we’ll be the strongest team that ever climbed in the Alps. [S16] (p 181) This quote represents how [S17] Captain Winter is so passionate to climb the citadel[S18] , to chase his dreams. He really needed the [S19] Emil, Franz and Rudi, which together they will accomplish. [S20] He will do everything [S21] to climb the citadel[S22] , that [S23] is why he needs other people to accompany him, to help him finish his dream. His father’s Son..... I will make a sling now, he said quitely. Then I will go down together. ([S24] p 270) Rudi kept chasing his dream to follow his father, when Saxo said his father’s son it made him realised that his father won’t let anyone behind. [S25] Although he would be proud of him for climbing the citadel[S26] , but [S27] his father will [S28] be more proud of him if he doesn’t [S29] leave anyone behind. The novel shows the requirement of chasing the dreams, where a little boy would do anything for his dream. [S30] Where a man will need people to help finish the dream and a boy who give up his dream and do what his dad would have done[S31] . With a [S32] strong determination and believe[S33] , you can accomplish your dreams, even the one you are most afraid of.
Damian Miller, a high school student at St. Prince high school, located in Brooklyn. [S34] Damian dreamed of joining the basketball team this year even with a skinny and delicate posture he has[S35] . His [S36] been watching NBA video’s [S37] in Youtube, which motivated him to try and join the team.
One day afterschool[S38] , Damian went to the gym for the team try out[S39] . The players were looking at Damian and one of them said “w[S40] hy are you here Damian? You don’t have any potential on joining [S41] the team.” Damia[S42] n replied “ I want to try out for the team, is there a problem in trying Andre?” Andre [S43] answered “ Of course! You can’t play basketball! You are not good enough.” Damian [S44] said “I’m going to prove you wrong!” Andre[S45] replied Damian [S46] with a laugh, and the rest follow Andre laughing at Damian[S47] .
When the practice started, Damian was tested by the coach. First the coach told Damian to do layups with his right hand and left hand. But Damian failed, nothing was falling in and everything was out of place[S48] . After doing some layups, the coach told him to do free throws. Still Damian failed, all [S49] of his shoots was [S50] not accurate and almost all of them was airballs. Coach[S51] said to Damian “ Sorry Damian, I cannot put you in [S52] the team. You have failed all the practices, better luck next quarter! Keep practicing and try again next quarter.” Damian [S53] replied “ Okay coach, I will keep practicing! Just wait and see coach!” Coach[S54] replied “ That’s the spirit!” Whe[S55] n Damian leaves [S56] the gym, Andre and the others laughed at him. “Told you! You don’t have the requirments to play basketball” said Andre. Damian [S57] did not reply, he leaves [S58] the room with a sad face and no spirit to fight.
At home, Damian was devastated. He remembers the laughs, insults [S59] from Andre. He remembers [S60] the rejection from coach[S61] , everything [S62] was to [S63] overwhelming. It motivates him, made [S64] him angry. Now he has [S65] the will again to try next quarter. Next quarter is still 3 months, still a long way to go[S66] . Damian owned a ring [S67] at his house, so every afterschool [S68] Damian went home to practice his skills. He practiced right hand layups and left hand layups, also [S69] freethrows. But still he fails, he went to his room and watch NBA video’s[S70] . The video [S71] really motivates [S72] Damian, since then Damian [S73] decided to do pushups and situps at home in order to make his muscle stronger. He [S74] keeps [S75] practicing, now Damian is [S76] lifting weights. His shooting got better, most of them falls in[S77] . His right hand layups keeps [S78] going in, but his left hand layups doesn’t still adjusting the power.[S79]
For weeks and weeks, Damian repeated his practice. Shooting from different positions, layups are falling in and his left layups are getting better. [S80] He keeps doing pushups and situps. Lifting weights really help him to shoot, more strength[S81] . That is why his shooting are falling, no more airballs[S82] .One [S83] more month till the next try out for the team, Damian was so pumped up. He keeps developing his shooting and layup, taking it to the next level. Shooting from different positions and layups. Then he tried to develope his dribble, by looking at NBA video’s. Practicing his crossovers, dribbling two balls and spins.Damian keeps repeating his practice, he got so much better, his skills was so developed, his body was not skinny anymore.
After one month, Damian came to the gym to try out for the team again. Then Andre came and said “What are you doing here? You want to get Rejected again?” (Andre Laughing). “I’ve come here to try for the team again. What’s your problem?” Replied Damian. “Keep your attitude kid! Show me what you got! Come here, play by one!” Said Andre. “okay, if you insist” Damian Replied. Coach came in and saw both of them playing against each other.
It was Damian’s possesion because he won the free throw, the coach was surprised cause [S84] now Damian is able to shoot a free throw.Damian dribbled the ball to the right, then he crossovers to the left and right again, Andre was off balance and it was the chance for Damian to drive. Damian sprint as fast as he can he did a right layup and it goes in. Damian took the first point, two more points for the win.Andre was surprised, he wondered how this boy improve his skills just for three months.
Coach was surprised also, from that moment Coach knew that he would join the team without anymore consideration. Then at was Andre’s possesion, he dribbles to the front and did a stepback for a three point and it goes in! The point change into 2 -1, Andre wins for the lead. One more point for Andre for the win. Damian still won’t give up, it was his turn, he dribbles the ball to the left, crossovers between his leg to the right and passes him. Suddenly Andre was able to block his path, soon Damian spins to the left and did a left hand layup and it goes in.The point was even 2 – 2, It was Andre’s possession and Damian must defend this one or Andre will get the win. Andre dribbled the ball to the right, he sprint so fast to the paint and passes Damian. Damian thought Andre will do a layup, Damian chased him for the block, but it was a fake. Damian already jumped, he was fooled and Andre took the stepback. Damian reached the floor and goes to Andre for another block, when Andre shoots Damian was infront of him and he blocks the ball. Damian took possession, damian dribbles to the right then he spins to the left, he pumped fake and Andre took the buy. Damian shoots the ball and it goes in! Damian take the Win. Coach clapped his hand and said “ Well done, Damian. You are now officialy joining the team.” Damian Replied “ Are you serious coach? Thank You coach!” Coach said “ You deserve it.”. After the lost Andre said to Damian “ Well done, sorry if I underastimated you.” Damian replied “No problem.” Damian reached his goal, now finally he joined the basketball team.
Criterion A: Content
The student does not reach a standard described by any of the descriptors given below.
§ Story is incomplete or plagiarized
The student demonstrates very limited understanding of the topic or theme. The work lacks detail, development and support. Creative pieces do not reflect imagination and sensitivity. The student’s response to literature demonstrates little or no awareness of the author’s intention or techniques.
§ Examples used to support the chosen theme are either inappropriate or not taken from different parts of the novel
§ Stated theme is evident through only one or two events in the story
§ Story is adapted from another story
The student demonstrates a limited understanding of the relevant aspects of the topic or theme. The work displays insufficient detail, development, and support. Creative pieces reflect limited imagination and sensitivity. The student’s response to literature sometimes demonstrates an awareness of the author’s intention and techniques.
§ Stated theme is evident through occasional events in the story
§ Story is slightly imaginative, though mostly unbelievable
The student demonstrates a sufficient understanding of the relevant aspects of the topic or theme. The work displays adequate detail, development and support. Creativity pieces reflect a degree of imagination and sensitivity. The student’s response to literature demonstrates an awareness of the author’s intention and techniques.
§ At least 1 example used to support the chosen theme are appropriate and taken from different parts of the novel
§ Stated theme is somewhat evident throughout events in the story
§ Story is somewhat imaginative, and some portions are believable
The student demonstrates a good understanding of the relevant aspects of the topic or theme. His work displays substantial detail, development and support. Creative pieces reflect substantial imagination and sensitivity. The student’s response to literature demonstrates a good appreciation of the author’s intention and technique.
§ At least 2 examples used to support the chosen theme are appropriate and taken from different parts of the novel
§ Stated theme is usually evident throughout events in the story
§ Story is imaginative and most parts are believable
The student demonstrates a perceptive understanding of the relevant aspects of the topic or theme. The work consistently displays illustrative detail, development, and support. Creative pieces reflect a high degree of imagination and sensitivity. The student’s response to literature demonstrates a sophisticated analysis of the author’s intention and techniques.
§ At least 3 examples used to support the chosen theme are appropriate and taken from different parts of the novel
§ Stated theme is clearly evident throughout events in the story
§ Story is highly imaginative, yet believable
Criterion C: Style and Language Use
The student does not reach a standard described by any of the descriptors given below.
§ Story is incomplete or plagiarized
The student’s use of vocabulary is often inappropriate and limited. Very frequent errors in spelling, pronunciation, punctuation and syntax persistently hinder communication. Little attempt has been made to use a register suitable to the intention and audience.
§ Frequent spelling and/or grammar errors which persistently hinder understanding
§ Very few properly used descriptive words
§ Only one or two elements of the plot line are clearly evident in the story
The student’s use of vocabulary is sometimes inappropriate and somewhat varied. Regular errors in spelling, pronunciation, punctuation and syntax hinder communication. The student attempts to use a register suitable to intention and audience.
§ Regular spelling and/or grammar errors which hinder understanding
§ Sometimes attempts to use descriptive words properly
§ Three elements of the plot line are clearly evident in the story
The student’s use of vocabulary is usually appropriate and generally varied. Some errors in spelling, pronunciation, punctuation and syntax sometimes hinder communication. The student often uses a register suitable to intention and audience.
§ Some spelling and/or grammar errors which sometimes hinder understanding
§ Often uses descriptive words properly
§ Four elements of the plot line are clearly evident in the story
The student’s use of vocabulary is appropriate and varied. Occasional errors in spelling, pronunciation and syntax rarely hinder communication. The student consistently uses a register suitable to intention and audience.
§ Occasional spelling and/or grammar errors
§ Consistent proper use of descriptive words
§ Five elements of the plot line are clearly evident in the story
The student’s use of vocabulary is always appropriate and greatly varied with very infrequent errors in spelling, pronunciation, punctuation and syntax. The student has mastered the use of a register suitable to intention and audience.
§ Very few, if any spelling and/or grammar errors
§ Use of descriptive words shows mastery
§ All elements of the plot line are clearly evident in the story (exposition, conflict, rising action, climax, falling action, resolution)
The score that I got for this work is really bad, and I'm not satisfied, I had a lot of comments and grammar issues and that is why I got a bad score for the essay. The score I received was a 6 and 4 which is why I'm not really happy about it. I chose this work because for me I think I have put a lot of effort and creating the idea but I just don't know how to show it. So that is why in the future I must improve my language by reading more books in order to improve my grammar in the future and to show what I mean in order to get a better grade for my other essays in next quarter.
This essay and book can be related to Human ingenuity by creativity, because by creating the book and this essay really took a lot of creativity. The first part is that I have took action by writing the creative essay, to put my ideas to this essay. Part two is that I have applied my evaluations and what I learned from the book and put it into the essay, so that I can create a creative essay. The last part is that I have think creatively to make this essay, where I put my creative thoughts to the essay and that is why my essay is quite creative.